I have never been diagnosed as ‘Depressed’. However, I do have some experience with the illness.
My mother has been depressed for most of my life and has only recently been able to seek help. Within my diaries as a child and more recently I have written my experiences and memories of her battling this state and how, from an outsider’s point of view, it felt to be completely powerless in being able to help. I have written my fears and concerns for her as I came to University and left her behind at home, alone.
Since within my performance I want to express my different views of Depression and Suicide these diaries will hopefully be able to be included.
Also, from a personal level, although I was never diagnosed with Depression or any illness I have come very close to taking my own life, expressing my emotions and thoughts within these diaries as the only form of expression I could use. Neither my family nor my friends know how far I was willing to go or serious I was about it and to this day, I have never told anyone. Therefore, there may be some material here that I can use as a personal element to the performance.
There are many reasons why people may become depressed or choose to end their lives, it maybe due to: bullying, problems at home, a close family member or friend dying or taking their own life, Job and/or money worries, PTSD etc. And each ‘reason’ may affect each person differently. This will need to be addressed within the performance.